"I'm a big Jo Malone candle freak, and I found these once when I got dragged into a department store, long, long time ago, got dragged into a department store shopping. I even forgot what the store is was. They smell pretty good, and then I found out that they make these giant things, they call 'em luxury candles, but they have limited fragrances. The fragrances are good, but they got many more fragrances in their little, small candles. Frankly, I have large rooms in my house, and I don't have to have to buy 15 or 20 little candles to scent the whole room, and these large candles do it. So every once in a while I check the Jo Malone website to see if they've added. What I'm looking for is gardenia. I love gardenias. I love gardenia flowers. I love the scent of gardenia. They've got 'em in these little dinky things, and they don't have them in the big ones. I check the website every now and then to see if they've added.

I finally, on the website this morning, about an hour before the program, I clicked on the "contact us" button, and there was an option there, if you want to get hold of somebody to make a fragrance recommendation. I said, "Well, that's me." So I clicked on it, and I put in the e-mail address and my name as they have it in my file. And I got instantly a reply: "Hi. I'm Beth. How can I help you?" I said, "This has gotta be a computer talking to me; nobody is going to respond this fast." So I put in a couple things, "I love the candles, I wish there was a large one, luxury candle with the gardenia scent," blah, blah.

And I got some perfunctory answers like a computer would be answering. So I thought I'd throw a curveball in there and ask a specific question that the computer couldn't handle, and, lo and behold, it was answered specifically, and I thought, hmm, this is a real person. Beth is not a computer, it's a real person. So I made the request and other things. She wrote back, "Are you a big fan of Jo Malone?" I said, "Check my file." She did, came back and said, "Well," and then she said, "I just have one question. Is this the Rush Limbaugh?" And I said, "Well, yes, indeed it is." "Well, I'm stunned." I said, "Why? Because you have mostly female customers?"

She said, "No, that I'm actually talking to you," and she said she was in Virginia. The point is she's going to forward the request on to the higher-ups, which is all I wanted. I don't know how to get hold of the grand pooh-bahs at Jo Malone. I mean, they're in London, for crying out loud.

*****

Size does matter, Snerdley, especially in candles. Well, when you have a large room, absolutely size matters. Why would want 18 little things. Well, that's about the only bright side, big carbon footprint with 18 wicks burning, that's true. But they don't last as long as the big ones do. (interruption) What do you mean, what's happened to me? Oh. Candles, kitty cats, what's happened to me? What do you think's happened -- the staff on the IFB, folks. Very sensitive? I've always been sensitive."